Wednesday, March 27, 2013
Light
A Florida senior citizen drove his brand new Corvette convertible out
of the dealership. Taking off down the road, he pushed it to 80 mph,
enjoying the wind blowing through what little hair he had left.
"Amazing," he thought as he flew down I-95, pushing the pedal even more.
Looking in his rear view mirror, he saw a Florida State Trooper, blue
lights flashing and siren blaring. He floored it to 100 mph, then 110,
then 120. Suddenly he thought, "What am I doing? I'm too old for this!"
and pulled over to await the trooper's arrival.
Pulling in behind him, the trooper got out of his vehicle and walked
up to the Corvette. He looked at his watch, then said, "Sir, my shift
ends in 30 minutes. Today is Friday. If you can give me a new reason
for speeding--a reason I've never before heard -- I'll let you go."
The old gentleman paused then said: "Three years ago, my wife ran off
with a Florida State Trooper. I thought you were bringing her back.
"Have a good day, Sir," replied the trooper.
Hahhaha...that was funny wasn't it. I have a friend named Jennifer who is dealing with some really tough things right now. Her elderly Mom is in hospital following a nasty fall and alot has fallen on Jennifer's shoulders...but yet today she took a moment and sent me this chuckle.( with a few others)
Where am I going with this folks??? Well Jennifer I was having a really hard time this morning finding a reason to smile. ( Well Olivia does get me smiling) but it was one of those dark cloud days. I have them often but like many others who deal with depression we fake it until we make it. Another friend recently said that depression should come with a cast, because we hurt alot, and yet we look fine....so most people don't understand us. Maybe you're shocked that I'm writing about such dark feelings but they are a complex part of many of us and we're not crazy, just sad. Unfortunately we can't get fixed really easily...above all we just need light.
Did that surprise you ? Yes light. Today I woke with that heavy head feeling. I got up, preparing for some commitments that I had made today. I jumped into that auto mode and started my check list. A while later, after doing some chores that I really didn't want to do ( but no one else would do) I went upstairs. I put my beautiful Olivia down for her nap. She gave me that precious smile, and gently laid her head down. She looked like she was saying....don't worry Nanny you'll be okay. I love her gentle spirit so much.
Then I did something...I closed her door and went to the rest of the rooms upstairs and opened all of the blinds. Even though the skies are grey today the LIGHT came in. I felt a power from it indeed.
It led me to think of my Savior who is the light of my life. David Bednar, an Apostle of the Lord once said.
" You and I may cry out, " No one understands. No one knows." But the Son of God perfectly knows and understands. He can reach out, touch, and strengthen us."
I believe this with all of my heart, and I just needed this Light moment to remind me of this. I have felt his Light in many things lately.......
- that Olivia smile and hug
-a special call from Laura right after I opened all of the blinds. She made me feel listened to. Thank you sweet daughter....appreciate your love so much.
-card making....I mailed some love out west today
-Emmy and Finley....I just had such a fun week with them ( wish that I had their energy) Love their hugs, and precious conversations...even the word WHY
-Facetime with my fab five.....how deeply I miss them
- Les Mis...with my son Michael...love one on one with this boy
-church....always ready to pour out the light...
-aunt May...loved remembering with her yesterday
-reading conference talks....oh so much wisdom
-an understanding chat with my sister in law Lynn last night..thanks sis
-a light joke...thank you Jennifer
-and so much more
Now folks...I could probably write a list that the dark side brings to me, not probably at all. How I wish that this would leave me but I fortunately know that these things are to help me become who I am supposed to be.
I loved a thought that I read recently that said something to the effect that when we feel like we're drowning...remember that the lifeguard can walk on water.
As we approach the celebration called Easter, I will state here that I am a daughter of God, and I am eternally grateful for the love that my brother, Jesus Christ has for me. He died on the cross willingly for me, to enable me to return to my Father in Heaven. HE knows me, and HE loves me, and HE never deserts me. I am grateful for the knowledge that I have of the Plan of Happiness.
All for now!! Go open the blinds!
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So many of us feel the same way Jackie... depression is invisible to most people, depending on how good we are as actresses... I sometimes feel like that...
ReplyDeleteAmazing testimony as usual, I always love to hear yours either in writing or in church. I am hoping to get myself together and get back to church myself.